Band Dillema

[SadFuzz]

So I've been playing in this band for 3 years, me and the drummer being the constant members. We've played several small shows, mainly spending time writing and rehearsing our own material. The drummer has been working with a friend's band for a few months and has seemed kinda hesitant about working as much with me. He rarely organises practice leaving that to me, but our practices go well and we never argue. My mum (we're still in school lol) is adamant that he's being malicious and working with my friend's band behind my back and not telling me about working with them, but I've known him for so long and he's not an unpleasant or manipulative person, just very socially awkward, a great drummer and a good person. So I'm of two minds about what to do and its hard when our practices go well and I enjoy playing with him, but my mum being negative about the situation is fucking with my head. There's nobody else I know that lives nearby that I can play with and I feel happier being in a band than on my own.
I'm just looking for guidance with the situation. Hopefully this isn't too complex or childish or whatever.

[parry]

...he's not an unpleasant or manipulative person, just very socially awkward, a great drummer and a good person.
...our practices go well and I enjoy playing with him
...There's nobody else I know that lives nearby... and I feel happier being in a band than on my own.

[SadFuzz]

Should've added that my mum's not letting me go to practice with him. Sounds kinda petty but yeah.

[MechaBulletBill]

Sounds more like a mom dilemma than a band one.

[SadFuzz]

Haha true

[marqueemoon]

Sounds more like a mom dilemma than a band one.

Yeah, this.

I think this is something you should be able to decide about in your own.

The important thing about being in a band is people share the same goals to some degree. If you feel like there’s a disconnect there talk to your friend about it.

It could very well be they are playing with other folks. If so it could just be they want to do something different in addition to what you’re doing together and not necessarily an indication they’re unhappy with what you’re doing together.

It doesn’t strike me as something that warrants some kind of big confrontation. Just have a talk and clear the air.